One And The Same
by AshAttackxx
Summary: After losing her mother in the Ishval war, 15-year-old Amber Rose's world came crashing down. Lost in grief and confusion, Amber did what was strictly forbidden: Human Transmutation. Now left with an auto-mail right arm, Amber is determined to replace what was lost and ventures out in search of the legendary Philosopher's Stone.


Chapter 1

"Water- 35 liters, Carbon- 20 kilograms, Ammonia- 4 liters, Lime- 1.5 kilograms, Phosphorous 800 grams, Salt- 250 grams," I repeated the ingredients sprawled out in front of me over and over again, careful not to forget any small detail, "Saltpeter- 100 grams, Sulfur- 80 grams, Fluorine- 7.5 grams, Iron- 5 grams, Silicon- 3 grams, and trace amounts of fifteen other elements. Perfect. Everything's here."

A smile found its way onto my face. After all these years, researching Father's alchemy notes that he left behind and calculating every single tiny detail, I'll finally be able to see Mom's beautiful smile again. _Forbidden, my ass_ , I thought to myself, shaking my head. Slapping a "forbidden" label on something is just a way for adults not to admit their failure. I promised myself that I would get Mom back, no matter the cost.

The moonlight illumined the abandoned barn that laid just a few miles outside my hometown of Kaumafy to the East. It cast an eerie, almost ominous, glow on the transmutation circle that I drew in the middle of the floor. No one ever came here, so this was the perfect place to perform the transmutation. My friends and I also use to play at this same barn before Mom got sent to Ishval to attend to the wounded during the war, since she worked for the military as a doctor in East City. We would play for hours until sunset, giggling and laughing like we had not a care in the world. _It feels like those days were a million years ago_ , I sighed. Since then, all my friends moved and I ended up having to live at Kaumafy's only orphanage.

Living at the orphanage was only supposed to be a temporary thing, seeing as I had no other family to take care of me since my deadbeat of a farther cheated on my mom and skipped out on us. I could feel my face heat up with all the rage I felt towards that man. I took a deep breath, trying to control myself. My gaze then turned to the small bag in the corner of the barn, filled with what little belongings I had. _Looks like I won't be going back to the orphanage anytime soon_.

 _Alright_ , I thought, bringing myself back down to Earth, _Time to get started_. I pulled the huge wash bin that I smuggled from the orphanage into the center of the circle. As I was putting the ingredients into the bin, I suddenly started getting a nagging feeling in my stomach. _Come on, Amber! Seriously? This is no time to back out now! Your calculations are flawless! Everything will be fine_. Annoyed at myself, I threw the last remaining ingredients into the bin and took out the small kitchen dagger I had in my pocket. I could see my reflection in the blade, my long, blonde hair tied up into a pony tail, loose strands falling down into my face, and my huge, wide eyes, shining bright like fiery golden embers. I ran the blade over my finger, blood oozing out from the gash. I dropped a few drops of my blood into the bin and smiled.

"My blood for my mom," I mumbled to myself, "Seems like an equivalent exchange."

I walked to the edge of the circle and did a final sweep of everything., that nagging feeling I had earlier still present. As I started to get down on my knees, my hands went to the tiny red pebble that was tied around my neck. _My mom gave me this neckless before she was sent off to Ishval,_ I thought to myself with a smile, _I never did get to thank her properly. That'll be the first thing I do, after I give her the biggest hug of course_.

"Alright! HERE GOES NOTHING!"

I took a deep breath, clapped my hands together, and then placed them on the transmutation circle. A bright light exploded all around me, drifting everything around me into plain whiteness. Wind echoed all around me vigorously, my hair unloosening from its tie and flailed all around me. _This is it! I'm finally going to get Mom back!_

Suddenly, the wind stopped. There was nothing but complete and utter silence. I looked around and saw that I was in front of a gigantic gate. It had strange markings and ancient writing that I couldn't make out.

"Wha…what the hell," I stuttered, trying to make sense of what was going on, "Where the hell am I?!"

"You foolish, foolish little girl." A voice echoed around me, it's tone almost mocking…not even human like.

"Who's there?! Who are you?"

I turned around and saw a human-like figure sitting crisscrossed on the floor. It looked human, but I knew it wasn't. It was completely white, no eyes or nose, just a big mouth that was smiling directly at me. Around this figure was a black aura-like mist, the only color around. Every inch of my body was screaming for me to run, but there was nowhere to run to, just whiteness and the huge mysterious gate.

"Who am I?" It chucked, it's smile turning almost malevolent, "One name you might have for me is the World, or you might call me the Universe, or perhaps God, or perhaps the Truth. I am All, and I am One. So, of course, this also means that I am you. I am the truth of your despair, the inescapable praise of your boastfulness. And now, I will bestow upon you the despair you deserve."

"What are you talking about," I exclaimed, trying to keep my voice from cracking with fear, "I gave what you wanted! I gave my blood! It's equivalent exchange! Now give me my mom!"

"Equivalent exchange? Do you honestly believe that a few drops of your blood is enough to bring a human back to life?"

The creature laughed, its tone mocking, almost emotionless I could feel my hands curl up into fists, my entire body trembling. _What the hell is this thing?! What does it mean that my blood wasn't equivalent exchange?! That's impossible!_

"The fact is, that it is virtually impossible to bring a human back. Nothing is ever equivalent to that of a human soul! That is Gods territory, and you so foolishly stepped into it! Now you must pay the toll!"

A gust of wind suddenly appeared and I turned around to see the gate opening. A million of what looked like tiny black hands came rushing towards me, grabbing me. I flailed around and screamed, trying to fight them off, but it was no use. _Dammit_! I screamed in my head. As I was being pulled into the gate, I was able to force myself to look behind me at the creature that called itself Truth. It was sneering at me and I saw that it was wearing the neckless my mom gave me. My eyes widened. Not only did it have my neckless, it had what looked like a human right arm! My jaw dropped. _No…that's…that's not possible!_

I turned my head and saw blood gushing out of a stump that use to be where my right arm was. Terror filled my eyes and I screamed, my body finally registering the pain of my missing limb. I fought against the black arms even harder, my breathing coming in gasps. I reached for the creature, as though it could possibly save me, only to see it wave at me with its…my…right hand, before the gate's doors closed.

Images flashed before my eyes as the black hands pulled me deeper and deeper into the gate. So many images that I couldn't make sense of it. Images from history, from the past, some that seemed like it was even from the future! It was as though all the information in the world was being shoved into my head. I screamed, feeling like my head was going to explode. Then, everything went black.

When I opened my eyes, I was back in the barn. Smoke filled the air, burning my eyes. I looked around and saw that I was in a pool of blood, and my eyes widened again, tears filling them.

"DAMMIT!" I screamed through gritted teeth, pounding my remaining fist at the floor. "THIS WASN'T SUPPOSE TO HAPPEN! EVERYTHING WAS PERFECT! THE FORMULA, THE CALCULATIONS! MOM! MOOOM"

I was losing a lot of blood. I could feel myself start to get lightheaded. I pulled my hand to the stomp to try and slow the bleeding, but nothing was working. _So this is it_ , I thought to myself, _this is how I'm going to die. That thing was right…I am a fool._

As the smoke in the barn started to clear, my eyes shifted to where the circle was. I could see movement within the shadows and suddenly, a human arm appeared out of the smoke. My heart almost skipped a beat! _Mom! She's alive! I actually did it!_ I reached my hand out towards her, but then the smoke cleared and my eyes filled with terror.

There, where my mom was supposed to be, was a mangled creature. It was unlike anything I've ever seen before! Its head and arms were bent at odd angles and its skin was black, almost like charcoal. It let out this horrid, inhuman scream that made my blood curl. I opened my mouth to scream, but nothing came out. The creatures blood-red eyes stared at me, piercing through me. I tried to get up and run, but I was too weak from the amount of blood I was losing. I fell back to the floor, on the verge of passing out. The last thing I remember seeing, are those creature's eyes staring at me.

"AMBER!"

"…LOST A LOT OF BLOOD!"

"…. TOO FAR! MAYBE WE SHOULD…"

"ROCKBELLS ARE…."

"…. RESEMBOOL…"

 _Wha…what's going on? Where am I? I'm hearing voices, but I can't seem to open my eyes. Rockbells? Why does that name sound familiar? So…weak…Is this what death feels like?_

When I finally came too, I was in an unfamiliar room. Sunlight was shining through the small window across the room and I could faintly hear birds chirping from outside. I tried to sit up, but a pair of hands pushed me back down.

"Hey! Easy there! You shouldn't move so fast!"

I looked up to see a little girl, around the same age as me, staring down at me. Her golden blonde hair was tied back in a ponytail, two strands flowing along each side of her face. Her piercing blue eyes looked at me with such empathy and worriedness.

"Amber, right?" She smiled at me, "I'm Winry. Winry Rockbell."

"It's nice to meet…" I started to say as I went to give Winry a handshake, but when I looked down, I saw that my entire right side was bandaged, including the stump where my arm was supposed to be.

Memories of what happened came flooding back and I could feel my eyes start to tear up. I turned my head away from Winry, and I could feel that she sensed my change in attitude. I could feel her looking at me, pitying me. _I don't need anyone pitying me,_ I thought sourly, _I made the mistake of trying to bring Mom back. I refuse to cry._

"I'll go tell Grandma that your awake." Winry said in a calming tone as she walked out of the room.

I could hear voices coming from downstairs, but I couldn't make out what they were saying. After a few minutes later, a petite old woman came in. Her gray hair was up in a bun and she was smoking a pipe that seemed to be twice her size. She wore round glasses and had on what looked like an apron.

"Glad to see your alive," She said in an old raspy voice, "You should be very thankful that the townspeople of Kaumafy found you and brought you here when they did. Otherwise, you'd probably be dead. I see you've already met my granddaughter. I'm Pinako Rockbell."

"I'm Amber. Amber Rose."

"Well Amber, why don't you tell me what happened?" Pinako asked in a stern tone.

I sighed and looked at her. Her gray old eyes were filled with sympathy and I just felt like I could trust her. _Well_ , _might as well get it over with._

"It's a long story…" I stated bluntly, my voice cracking under the pain that lingered.

"Well, lucky for you, I have nothing but time."

After I told Pinako everything that had happened, she just stared at me for a moment, taking a couple puffs from her pipe. I could feel her gaze on me as she processed my story.

"It's incredible how much you remind me of a certain someone I know," She mumbled to herself under her breath as she got up from the chair that was placed next to the bed I laid in. "Nonetheless, I'm glad to see your alive. After an incident like that, you need all the rest you can get. I'll be back in a couple minuets with a nice warm meal for you."

"Oh no Mrs. Rockbell," I started to protest.

"No need for the formality dear." Pinako smiled at me as she headed towards the door. "Just call me Aunt Pinako. And don't think about arguing! Your body has been through a great ordeal and it needs nutrients in order to heal."

"Nutrients aren't going to bring my mom back," I said coldly, my hand reaching towards the stomp of what use to be my right arm, "and it sure as hell isn't going to give me back my arm."

"Honestly, what did you expect would happen, stepping into God's territory like that?!" Aunt Pinako's tone felt like daggers, her eyes piercing my very soul. I felt like a dog that just got kicked for peeing on the carpet by its owner. Aunt Pinako walked back toward me and placed her wrinkled hand on my bowed head.

"Listen Amber," Her voice taking a softer tone, "I know all too well what you're going through. In fact, my granddaughter and I have built auto mail for a young man, right around your age in fact, that went through the similar experience."

"Really?"

My eyes widened at this information. _If someone else attempted human transmutation, and lived to tell the tail, maybe there is a way for me to get my original body back!_

"Is he here," I asked, my voice filling with excitement and hope, "Could I speak to him?"

"Sadly, he isn't. He left with his younger brother a few months ago to become a State Alchemist."

"State Alchemist?!" I gasped at the idea that a 10-year-old boy would even think of wanting to become a State Alchemist, much less even be able to join for being so young. "Isn't he too young?"

"Generally speaking, yes. But he has a spark in him that refuses to burn out." Aunt Pinako smiled at the thought of this young man.

Suddenly, it hit me. The reason why the name Rockbell sounded so familiar.

"Aunt Pinako," The name running smoothly off my tongue, as though I've known this woman my entire life, "Your son was a doctor wasn't he?"

She seemed taken aback by my sudden question. "Yes he was, why do you ask?"

"Because my mother was also a doctor, and I remember she mentioned working with a couple called Rockbells. They must have been deployed to Ishval at the same time. I remember her telling me how her colleague came from a long line of auto mail engineers, and then you mentioning how you've built auto mail for that young man only confirmed that! So, I guess what I'm trying to say is," I paused for a moment, my golden eyes pleading for her to agree.

"What I'm trying to say is, would you build me an auto mail arm?"

"Amber," I could tell just by her shocked expression that my request took her off-guard, "I don't think you understand the seriousness of what you are asking for. The surgery alone is incredibly painful, not to mention the length of time for rehabilitation. Plus, the cost of the procedure…"

"I know what I'm asking for is a lot, but I could work off the cost of it by learning auto mail engineering! That will help you around the shop wouldn't it? I don't care how long the rehabilitation process is, what is it? A year?"

"More like two," Aunt Pinako said, "It's not something that could be fixed in just a couple days, Amber."

"6 months," I looked down at my hand, a fire inside me burning brighter than ever. I clutched my hand into a fist, "I'll finish the rehabilitation in 6 months! I know I probably sound insane, but I just know I can do it. I will get my original body back, no matter the cost."

Aunt Pinako stared at me for a moment, her eyes wide. She took a couple more puffs from her pipe and slowly shook her head.

"How could I possibly say no to free help?" She chuckled as she walked towards the door. She reached out and went to turn the handle, but hesitated, looking back at me with a smile

"And besides," Her tone was distant, like her mind was in another place, "You have the same golden fire in your eyes that he had."


End file.
